Skip to content

Fear is stupid. Stupid fear.

24 October 2007

10.24 wed
Wow, I’m out of practice. Well, the iPod is loaded with a new This American Life all about the senses…pumped about that. Going to try to make it 50 minutes today. Feel like in order to stay on track for my hour+ next week, I need to.
I KNOW I can do it! I’ve done it before, recently. And I’ve been working up to it. I know that. But the fact that I had a slightly off week last week scares me. I’m scared I’ve reverted all the way back to July. That I won’t be able to breathe, that my muscles have all shrunk, that I just won’t remember how to run.
Fear is stupid. Stupid fear.

Ok, now go run.

This American Life episode: “Maps”
I think spoken word helps on a long run (perhaps I should get an audiobook??) because it’s something I haven’t heard before, and it keeps my brain distracted.

Am so proud of myself. I am walking sex. In that sex is stinky, sweaty, and a little awkward. But still. I am the hottest thing alive.
(Ok so let’s take a little detour into my nerd-dom for a second. I was just wondering if “walking sex” is a common enough term, and wondering whether people will get that I’m being ironic ((and yes I know it’s REALLY nerdy to explain that you’re being ironic)) well anyway I look it up on urban dictionary, and their definition is basically a dude who isn’t sexy but, not unlike Austen Powers, has a certain sex appeal. Yeah, that’s about right. Ok. We’re done.)

47 degrees isn’t so hard to run in after all. In fact, the hardest part was just getting started (and a few big gusts of wind). I think that the cold air actually forces me to breathe deeper and I found breathing much easier today. And keeping up strides easier as well. Huh.

I feel a little now like my body is recovering from a long swim. My skin is warming up but deeper down I still feel cold. I feel ready for a long nap. Oh man the sleep you get at the beach is the best sleep! Exhausted from the hot sun and the cold water and the moving around all day. Falling into a hotel bed is heaven on earth.

Amazed at how not-difficult it was today. The last 15 minutes were hardest to sustain. Keeping up momentum, and the wind was fierce!
Now I’m curious about consuming water and “energy” on a longer run. I feel like such a juvenile when it comes to things like this. There are little packets of gel that you eat when you get tired? Really? How does that work exactly? I don’t even know how to ask these questions! in some ways I am still a tourist in the foreign land of running. I don’t know all the local secrets, and I’m still figuring out my way around it. I’m not sure I’d even know how to read a map if I had one. But that’s one way to get around a new place; just keep exploring it until you figure things out. Asking those who seem like they know what they’re doing along the way.

Ugh. I think the part of my brain that detects when a metaphor has gone too far was damaged in today’s run. I apologize.

One Comment leave one →
  1. arthi permalink
    14 November 2007 5:10 am

    you are a joy.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: